<div dir="ltr"><span title="2014-07-18">Az USÁ-ban már iparszerűen propagálják és élik a homoszexualitást, továbbá megbélyegzik, bíróság elé állítják a homoszexualitást erkölcstelenségnek, bűnnek nyilvánítókat, még akkor is, ha elismerik, hogy az "homoszexualitás elkövetői" leginkább csak áldozatai (lélektani, ill. megrontási okokból) a romboló divatnak.<br>
<br>Ajánlom szíves figyelmetekbe <u><b>egy új a homoszexualitást feladni tudókkal, készült dokumentumfilmról írt összefoglalót,</b></u> l. alább. <br></span><div><span title="2014-07-18"><br>
July 18, 2014</span>
<h1>New Film Shows How to Leave the Gay Life Behind</h1>
<span><a href="http://www.crisismagazine.com/author/austin-ruse" target="_blank">Austin Ruse</a></span>
<img src="http://3m7ajlsrzj92lfd1hu16hu7vc.wpengine.netdna-cdn.com/wp-content/uploads/2014/07/Everlasting-Hills-Movie.jpg" alt="Everlasting Hills Movie" height="341" width="570"> <div>
<p><b>The modern day LGBT movement wants you to believe</b> that the people featured in the new documentary “<a href="http://everlastinghills.org/trailer/" target="_blank"><i>Desire of the Everlasting Hills</i></a>” really don’t exist. They are figments of the fevered imaginations of the Christian right.</p>
<p>Meet Dan, Rilene and Paul, all refugees from deep enmeshment in the
LGBT life, each finding a home in sexual sobriety and, not incidentally,
the Catholic Church.</p>
<p>It is impossible to watch this important documentary without tears,
and not sad tears either, but happy ones, tears that come from a joyful
movement of the spirit.</p>
<p>These are people who have been deeply wounded by the choices they have made and who have struggled through to a profound peace.</p>
<p>The documentary makes its world premier this weekend at the annual
conference of the Courage apostolate in Philadelphia. Courage is the
Church-approved movement of same-sex attracted men and women who have
decided to step away from that life and to reengage with who they really
are and were meant to be.</p>
<p>The readers of these pages and the pages of <i>First Things</i>
will recognize one of them—Dan Mattson—from his jousting with the group
we call The New Homophiles. He is open about his struggle with same-sex
attraction but insists it does not define him. He tells his story in
great detail in this new movie.</p>
<p>Mattson was at once attracted to men but at least initially repelled
by what happens sexually. Expecting fireworks, his first time was an
enormous letdown, and then depression and shame. “What have I done?” he
asked himself over and over as he drove back home.</p>
<p>Early on in his search for the gay life, he googled “I am gay and….”
The first result was “…and I want a boyfriend.” The second result was
“…and I want to die.” He understood this while he was never suicidal; he
thought death would be welcome.</p>
<p>He prayed fervently for the same-sex attractions to leave him. Better
to be a leper than gay. When the feelings didn’t leave, he turned on
God. He still believed but he hated Him, indeed wanted Him dead. God
made promises that he could not fulfill. His promises were hogwash.
Mattson says he would pass the Cathedral in his town and almost every
day “shoot it the bird.”</p>
<p>He dove into the gay life.</p>
<p>Was Mattson ever attracted to women? He went to a strip club and
struck up a conversation about gardening with the woman trying to give
him a lap dance. She gave him gardening tips that he uses to this day.</p>
<p>Mattson had only one real boyfriend and for a time he was happy. But
he longed for a family, for children. On the verge of finally telling
his family that he was with a man, Mattson fell in love with a woman at
work.</p>
<p>Dan says in the year he was with her he felt once more that God loved
him and when that broke up he was tempted to go back online to find
guys but he was “convinced the path to peace” was not that way. Quoting
C.S. Lewis, Mattson says the boy in pain chooses safety but the man
chooses to find the meaning of suffering. Safety for Lewis was turning
from God as was Mattson’s, in addition to porn and meeting guys online.
And now he has chosen the way of the man.</p>
<p>He sees his whole life has been a search to understand himself and to
find consolation and that he has found both in the commandments of God.
When he passes the Cathedral these days, the one he shot the bird at,
he sees those three domes as a sign of beauty, a harbor that he
embraces. Mattson says, “We were made for better stuff than what we
settle for. My whole life I settled. I don’t want to settle anymore even
if it means a life of being single.”</p>
<p>Where Mattson’s was an immense interior drama played out on the tiny
stage of small town life, Paul played his out in the gilded and
dangerous playground of New York in the 1970s.</p>
<p>Paul started the gay life at 15 on the beaches of Miami, eventually
becoming an international model in New York. He was one of those
beautiful people literally hanging out with Cher at Studio 54, drenched
in “drugs and sex and disco.”</p>
<p>Paul said Manhattan in those days “was like finding Oz. If you were
good looking, it was totally heaven.” He spent much of his time cruising
for men. Once in Rome he read in his gay travel guide that the Coliseum
was the place to pick up strangers though his plans were foiled because
it was Good Friday and John Paul II was there leading an enormous crowd
in the Stations of the Cross. His libido was stilled but only for a few
hours and he went cruising someplace else.</p>
<p>He says his sexual appetite was insatiable, “frantic.” He went
through “dozens, and then hundreds and eventually thousands of men,
becoming insensitive to what it means to be with a partner both body and
soul.”</p>
<p>Paul was frantic sexually at the time and place where HIV/AIDs first
struck and did such devastation. One of his lovers was among the first
900 people diagnosed with the deadly disease. He says, “90 percent of my
friends got AIDs and died.”</p>
<p>He moved to San Francisco to get away from the death and dying in New
York. He moved in with a man, into a huge house on lots of property in
Sonoma County though he did not end his promiscuity.</p>
<p>You might think that Paul worried about AIDs. He did but just
assumed, after thousands of men, he was infected like all of his
friends. So, he never got tested. But then AZT was discovered, the drug
that adds years to the HIV patient’s life.</p>
<p>Going for a test, he says, “I remember so clearly driving down
Dolores Avenue feeling doomed and then a ray of sunshine came through
the sun roof and I felt peace and comfort. And then I heard a voice,
from the center of my being, saying you do not have AIDs because you
have too much to do to make up for how you have been living.” He said he
knew with certainty that the words were true, and when the doctor
confirmed he was negative “was the most wonderful feeling in the world.”</p>
<p>And then he met Mother Angelica.</p>
<p>Watching TV late into the night and early morning after a night of
frantic sex, he was flipping channels “and an image came on my
television that was so strange.” He called out to his boyfriend to come
and look. Together they mocked Mother Angelica, who at the time had an
eye-patch and a quite obvious stroke. They called her the pirate nun.</p>
<p>But when his boyfriend left the room she said “something so
intelligent, real and honest; ‘God created you and I to be happy in this
life and the next. He cares for you. He watches your every move. There
is no one you know who can do that.’”</p>
<p>She became his dirty little secret. He would hide her from his
boyfriend, changing the channel when he turned the TV off so that EWTN
would not come up when it was turned back on.</p>
<p>Paul eventually went into a Catholic Church, hiding himself so no one
would see because, as eventually happened, he would lose friends and
clients if they knew. Eventually he went to confession and “confessed
all Ten Commandments.”</p>
<p>Paul says, “I was happy. I was in Toyland, Never-Never land in New
York City. Some of my most euphoric moments was when I was with
beautiful and famous people in penthouses overlooking the spectacular
skyline of New York City and I have got to tell you, that happiness,
that euphoria that would have lasted me a lifetime pales next to when I
am taking the body and blood of our Lord in Mass.”</p>
<p>No matter what the sexual left says, Paul and Dan are real, as is
Rilene who quite unexpectedly spent 25 years in a lesbian relationship.
Each went into a life they found ultimately unsettling, unsatisfying,
even repellent, and though sometimes lonely, each of them knows what
Rilene says at the end of the movie.</p>
<p>She is talking about what the young Rilene would say about “Church
lady Rilene.” The young version of her would “laugh hysterically. All
that church stuff is for people who are weak, people who can’t get it
together, people who are poor and sick and can’t manage their lives.”</p>
<p>“True enough,” she says. “Here I am.”</p>
<p>“Contentment comes with a sense of peace and well-being and I have a sense about my life that I am safe and I’m home.”</p>
<p>Many in the gay life are desperate to get out. But the world
conspires against them. It’s impossible. This is who you are. Those
people are lying who say they are changed.</p>
<p>These brave people—Dan, Paul and Rilene—and all those in the
apostolate Courage are living testaments to the possibilities that it
can be left behind and that what opens up is not just the desire but the
bounty of the everlasting hills.</p>
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